Notes....

I have been writing notes on my iPod and I thought it would be good to put them up. yeah? Out of my League This is my new favorite song. It's so simple and sweet. I want so badly to have a good man feel this way about me. You know? But I'm so afraid of it. Oh I'm such a hopeless romantic. I find that I'm addicted to the idea of love, but I am so afraid of it finding me. I don't know why I have this crazy fear and yet this longing need. I just don't get it. How could someone so consumed with the idea of love be so terrified of it? I see it all around me and those who have it seem so very happy. How can I find that kind of love? I have looked for years and still have not yet found it. I don't know if it sis because of my fear that it has eluded me for so long or something else. It really drives me nuts. I don't think I can count all the times I thought I was in love and was roughly told other wise. How many times can one heart almost fall in love before it truly does or dies? Oh, I don't want my heart to die without knowing what true love is. There is a song we sing in a Capella, it's called "I am not yours". It is the most beautiful thing of longing for love and never finding it I have ever experienced. I want love just as much as the poet did but I want the ending to be so different. I want to find that love and instead of "I am not yours", I will be able to say "I am yours." But for now I will sit and know that I am out of my league once again.....